Once the Fire is Alight

It’s Painful
Destructive
Confusing
Alienating
Sometimes terrifying
Confronting
Demanding

And yet it calls us

Freedom calls us
Truth calls us
Love calls us
Transformation calls us

And we would willingly
Walk through the fire
And drown in the ocean
Face the pain
The destruction, confusion and alienation
Meet the terror
Be willingly confronted
And accept the demands

Because once love’s truth has been tasted
And the fire has been lit
Nothing else will satisfy the soul
That’s the deal
Waking up from the dream is tough
Which is probably why so many
Choose to stay asleep.

Image by Fruity-Paws from Pixabay

Death is a Dear Friend No-One Likes

Eventually this body will fall away
Form itself will dissolve
Back to wherever it came from
Nothing left of me
But a fragrance

This I accept with grace
Because it is inevitable

It brings a preciousness to my time here
It reminds me what it important
It shows me the pointlessness
Of unnecessary worry

The inevitability of death
Brings everything into context
That’s why I hold it close to me
I don’t push it away
Death is a dear friend
No one likes
I have befriended them
And made them an ally
And now they are not as scary
And I can live fully
Here and now
Alive and available

Eventually everything will dissolve.

Image by Johannes Plenio from Pixabay

A Cellular Calling to Love

Deep in the consciousness
Of the cellular body
Part of you still exists
You could call it the past
But it’s not really the past
It is here, now, in the cellular body
Intricately bound up with mind
Woven into the nervous system
It speaks to you in triggers and self talk
Asking to be released
And begging to come home
To fullness and love

What could not be processed then
What could not be met then
What was too much then
What was violation then
What was traumatic then

Is here now to be released
And allowed to become free

The good news is that allowing it all
Even though it brings grief and anger
Tears and old fears
The cleansing it brings
Revitalizes the entire system
And brings the whole of you online
As an integrated being.

This is love.

Image by Arek Socha from Pixabay

Reclaimed Innocence

When I sit with you
And you show me your self
You reveal the pain and darkness
And all the times your innocence
Was closed down in fear

I see you
I see inside you
I see that which is not broken
I know you want to fix yourself
Because it hurts
But there is nothing to fix
Because you are not broken
Just wounded

I see your vulnerability
And sadness
Your anger and doubt
But there! In all that
I see your beauty
Still there, hiding, waiting

I see your innocence
Not gone, just waiting
Silently in the shadows
For the moment it can return
Surely it will return upon death
But there is a way
To allow innocence back, now

Innocence is the heart
It is like the sun
It can’t break
It can be hidden by dark clouds
That last a lifetime

Open all your doors
The ones you have kept closed
For protection all these years
You no longer need them
You are stronger than you know
And your strength
Is your openness
Your tenderness
And your reclaimed innocence.

Image by S. Hermann & F. Richter from Pixabay

The Splendor of the Wreckage

It took me to the edge of myself
I had to die to be reborn
The old self is gone
He was dysfunctional, angry
Distracted, obsessed,
He lived in the past
And carried the bags of pain
With righteous indignity
There was so much beauty in him
Hidden under the weight
Of stories of self
His body was toxic
Nervous system triggered
Always running running away
And then running running towards
And beneath the surface
Such a deep anxiety and despair

All gone, all dissolved
As a dream dissolves
Upon meeting the dawn

Replaced now with presence
With emptiness
With no story, just this
With a love that has no cause
Just this, just this

It took me years
To lose myself
To find my Self
I had to let go of everything
I became so sick
In body, emotion and mind
I came face to face with death
I screamed, I wailed, I raged

Oh I have been there my friend
I know the journey
Of unravelling the knots and the stories
It’s like letting go on an entity
The pain body hangs on to us
And we must let go of it
Again and again
Until it finally just dissolves
Like the dream it is

For me it was like a rebirth
For some people it is gentle
But if you carry trauma
Then it may be an arduous release
But when people come to me
With their new age ways
Of trying to perfect themselves
And make it alright
And tell me they have awakened

It makes me want to laugh
And cry

The transformation we talk about here
Is a demolition of all that is false
And that’s pretty much everything
We don’t rebuild ourselves
From the debris

We live in the splendor
Of the wreckage.

Photo by Samuel Zeller on Unsplash

One Big Invitation To LOVE

All I saw
The whole of life
With all it’s challenges
All its suffering and sorrow
And despite the mind screaming NO!
All I saw
Was one big invitation
To love deeper and deeper
Even as death’s veil
Cast itself around everything
All I could see was some natural intelligence
Vast and eternal, whole and indivisible
Inviting each individuation to remember love
Ever deeper, ever deeper
Sometimes I can’t believe what I have seen
But there it is, always
The same invitation
Love is the only reality.

Image by Okan Caliskan from Pixabay

A Prayer to the Divine

Just for a moment
Let us stand here naked and empty
Free of all this burden of living
Just stand here as the air
As free as emptiness
No words needed
For there is nothing to say
We can hold our heads high to the heavens
Or bow them down to the deepest ground
It doesn’t matter
It is all a prayer to the divine.

Image by Barbara Jackson from Pixabay